Little Johnny, with his hand waving eagerly in the air, is finally called on. He did it and asked why Johnny wanted to hear him croak.Johnny said, Mommy said that well be loaded when you croak.Little Johnny and his class were talking about the word definitely.When asked to put it in a sentence, his classmates were pretty successful in doing so.Johnny spoke up, asking Are farts solid?Everyone laughed and said no.He chuckled, saying, Then I definitely pooped my pants.Johnny got caught digging a hole in his yard.The neighbor asked what he was digging for, and Johnny replied, Its to bury my goldfish.The hole was pretty big, so the neighbor was confused. Your teacher is coming, hide and I will say you arent here.No, Little Johnny replied you go hide. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); What about it? He says: Well, the last generation just dropped it., 12. What happened?Johnny explains: Miss, Dad asked me again, Johnny are you sleeping?. All Rights Reserved. Johnny said, Well, he likes to cut people in half. No, no. said the teacher terrified. Dirty little Johnny jokes. I told the teacher that I went to your funeral.A teacher asks Little Johnny what he wants to be when he grows up.I want to be a detective and follow in my fathers footsteps, says Johnny.Thats very admirable of you, says the teacher. Does anyone know another word. Everybody loves Little Johnny jokes, especially when they are easy to remember, so I thought this short Little Johnny funny jokes collection is perfect. 145 Short Dirty Jokes That Bring More Adult Humor, 157 Dirty Minded Jokes That Will Bring Out Your Naughty Side, 155 Best Wedding Jokes to Kick off Your Speech, 160 Hilarious Wife Jokes to Spark Joy in Your Marriage, 150 Hilarious Train Jokes to Engineer Laughs on Your Face, 150 Hilarious Tree Jokes to Fresh Your Mind, 152 Hilarious Wine Jokes to Make Conversation More Enjoyable, 151 Hilarious Tomato Jokes That Are So Juicy. Little Johnny says, Do you know what I think? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope to introduce you to after dinner.. And that is that when you keep making faces, your face finally cant go back and you end up really ugly.Little Johnny quiets and says, Well, at least you were warnedTeacher: If you had two dollars and you asked your daddy for another dollar, how many dollars would you have in the end?Without hesitation, Johnny answers, Two dollars.Teacher isnt happy, Come on, Johnny, you dont know how to count.Johnny shrugs, Maybe, but I do know my dad!Teacher asks his class one day, What would you like to be when you grow up?Johnny answers first, saying, I will follow in my fathers footsteps and become a policeman.Teacher raises his eyebrows, Johnny, I didnt know your father is a policeman.Well, he isnt, explains Johnny. They know really, Why was the Geologist expelled from Reform School? "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" A young female teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz behind my back Ive got something red, round and you can eat it. Previous joke A Man Was Driving Along The Motorway. And now tell us all how it is spelled.Johnny: Oh, I just remembered he got reposted to Goa.Mother, English teacher asks class: Which tense is the sentence I AM BEAUTIFUL?Little Johnny replies, Clearly, past tense.Little Johnny goes to the zoo with his mom.Johnny: Mom, look, theres a finger in the shark tank! Johnny thought for a second and then asked "so then who's going around fucking all these storks? Just go to school. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, Tell me, April, who created the universe? When April didnt stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. Susie says "I wanna be Johnny's bitch. There was another pair exactly like this one at home.. Me, my mum and my dad, we sleep on the same bed. Shocked, the teacher, trying to retain her composure says, "Wow, Johnny, four syllables, that certainly is a mouthful" 1 Comments. She was a doctor.A doctor? Asked the teacher, who was moved.Yeah, see? has an "r" after 6. Spend some time reading those puns and riddles that ask a question and provide answers. They are the best Lil Johnny jokes Internet has to offer. I never want you to use language like that again. Of course not, Johnny! Next - 25 Little Johnny Jokes. I give you two, Jimmy gives you two more, and then Sally gives you two more.Johnny spends a few minutes thinking it out, and again says, Seven.The teacher says, Lets try it another way. All of them are dirty.'" If you liked this, please share by using the share button below. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?Sherman: I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. Again, the teacher asked for the moral of the story. Little Johnny pulled out his pee-pee in class today! Not really sure what was going on, she showed Little Johnny. Please let us know in the comment section. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". Thats not what I taught them. At age six you told me the Easter Bunny didnt exist. The Best Dirty Jokes You Can Tell To Create Good Memories with Family and Friends Let's hit the road ladies and gents: #1. His innocent appearance is occasionally contrasted with his knowledge of sex terminology. Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day. His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! "; Little Johnny Jokes That Make You Laugh Jokes To Tell Your Friends. She replies, "No". Here, have a carrot! He keeps asking us!And, Johnny? She said yes, dad. So, said his dad Find your mother, now, and ask her if shed sleep with the mailman for $10,000 as well.The boy does as he is asked, and then returns to his father again.She said yes too, dad. Well, there you go. said the dad.The boy looked at his father, puzzled.He smiled, Potentially were sitting on a gold mine; but, actually I live with a couple of whores!Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, mommy mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddys clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started.The mother cuts him off and says just stop right there. It means the car wont start., 9. The first grade teacher was starting a new lesson on multi-syllable words, she thought it would be a good idea to ask a few of the children examples of words with more that one syllable. Yes, Johnny replies.The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnnys teacher, What on earth are you teaching my son in class? she asks.The teacher replies, Right now, we are learning mathematical addition.The mother asks, And are you teaching them to say one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven?After the teacher stopped laughing hysterically, she answers, What I taught them to say was, one plus six, the sum of which is seven.The teacher was trying to put to use her recent psychology education.She asked everyone in her class, Alright, if any of you think you are stupid, please stand up!A few seconds pass by and then Little Johnny stands up.Startled, the teacher says, Oh, do you think youre stupid,Little Johnny? No, Miss, but I didnt want to leave you standing all alone!Teacher asks Little Johnny, Johnny, how old is your father?Hes as old as me, Johnny informs her.Now how would that be possible? inquires the surprised teacher.Well he became father the day I was born.. Why are his legs sticking in the air?His father thinking quickly said, Son, thats so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven.Gee Dad thats great, said Little Johnny. You need to hide, grandpa. 42 Nerdy Jokes that work like Gravity you cannot put them down! Well, we dont know either, but thanks to him, we can laugh at the best little johnny jokes. Follow us on Pinterest and we will love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog. Johnny asked his mother for his allowance a few days early. This week in Little Johnnys English class, they were learning about punctuation.When they got to periods, Johnny asked, Why are periods so important?The teacher informed him and asked why he wanted to know.He said, When my sister told us that she missed a period, my father began yelling, and my mom passed out.Some of the older neighbourhood boys have been making fun of Little Johnny lately.There latest trick is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime.Johnny always takes the nickel and the older boys laugh at him.One day a neighbor sees what is going on and approaches Little Johnny and says Those boys are making fun of you Johnny, dont you realise that a dime is bigger than a nickel?Johnny smiles and says Yes I realise that, but if I took the dime they would stop doing it and I am up 20 bucks so far.This happened with my great uncle and young cousin for years.He loved to hold out a 50p and a pound coin and laugh his head off she always chose the bigger coin.Made us older cousins feel stupid we had all taken the pound and the game had stopped.Little Johnny asks the teacher, Can I be punished for something I havent done?The teacher is shocked. Copyright eSmartass 2013 - 2014. By clicking Accept All, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. "My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war, and his plane was shot down over enemy territory. If you now tell me that grown-ups dont really have sex, then Ive got nothing left to live for!, Fred and Mary got married, but cant afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Freds parents home for their first night together. Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle joe last summer.Little Johnny is out trick or treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. When mom and dad come out of the room, they explain to Johnny that sometimes daddys get a big tummy and mommys have to jump on it so it will deflate. Little Johnny was overheard by his mother reciting his homework, Two plus two, the son of a b*tch is four; four plus four, the son of a b*tch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a b*tch;Johnny! shouted his mother. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends! Where on earth did you pick it up? From my father. said Johnny. We were all in church saying our prayers. When his Dad came home Johnny said, Dad our rooster is dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Usually she slept through the class. Little Timmy says, I can feel Jesus presence during Mass. Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. "Put your hands behind your back and tell me what's three and three." A young female teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz "behind my back I've got something red, round and you can eat it. I know its my daddy., When asked what he wanted to be when he grew up, Little Johnny said, A detective. More jokes about: animal, death, little Johnny While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. Sadly, the baby was born without any ears.When the mum and baby came back home from the hospital, Johnnys family was invited over to see the baby. Johnny said, Well, the cars not real either., Read more: Fast and Crazy Car Jokes and Puns. "That's right!" Do you know what I think?, asks Little Johnny The cashier said, Theres no way I can take this. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. I see why they kicked him out of there." Dirty Little Johnny Jokes Collection Who wants some dirty jokes? All rights reserved. The teacher looked a little shocked. She says to Johnny, What a cute costume, but let me ask you.Where are your buccaneers?Little Johnny says back, Theyre under my buckin hat lady.The elementary class was learning about additionThe teacher asks little Johnny, If I give you two cats, and Jimmy gives you two more, and Sally gives you two more, how many cats would you have?Johnny thinks about it for a few seconds and says, Seven.The teacher says, No, lets try again. Great Jane that has two syllables, Monday Kind regards, John. Four plus four, that son of a bitch is eight.His mum overhears this and is shocked! The teacher was going down the list, asking students to use the words in a sentence.Rectum, she said, and Johnny eagerly waved his hand, but she had some experience with Johnny, so she called on Susie instead.The next word was defecate, and again, she thought it best not to call on Johnny despite his enthusiastically raised hand.Finally, she came to urinate, and figured Johnny couldnt do much harm with that one. TEACHER: Johnny, use defeat, deduct, defense, and detail in one sentence.JOHNNY: De-feet of De-duck went over De-fence before De-tailWhile grading essays, the teacher noticed that Little Johnnys paper about Family Pets was the same as his brothers.So she asked, Why did you copy your brothers homework?Little Johnny said, No, I didnt! What was the question?Jimmy replied, The question was Who threw the trash can at the principals head?Johnny, wheres your homework? Miss Martin said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand.My dog ate it, was his solemn response.Johnny, Ive been a teacher for eighteen years. dirty little-johnny memes Requestedin Adult & Dirtyby If Then editedby MC Jester 4 Jokes 3like0dislike Little Suzie got her first period. Teacher: What do you want to be when you grow up? Johnny: I want to follow in my fathers footsteps and be a policeman. Teacher: I didnt know you father was a policeman. Johnny: He isnt. One day Jimmy got home early from school.His elder sister asked, Why are you home so early?He answered, Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class.She said, Wow, my brother is a genius. And she said we should recite it till we learned it! The next day his mother went to the teacher to complain. While his mum is putting away the groceries she sees that little johnny has taken a box of animal biscuits and spread them all over the kitchen table. Please stop, dad! No kids, however, could offer her a solution. "You didn't steal it, did you?" "No!" said Jimmy. Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" 4. And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." He asked his parents where they got him from. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. The Teacher fainted. I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce to you after dinner.Little Johnny is walking down the street and sees a construction site building new housesHe has a look at whats going on and hes amazed and in awe of it all. Then the teacher asked April a third question. Johnny said, All dad said was, Make sure you wash my underwear, too.. I have told you before that the customer is always right. Do you understand me?" Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. Please sign up with your best email address. Youll never know when youll need it. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John would always take the nickel they said, because it was bigger.One day after John grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Little Johnny asks his Dad Whats between moms legs?The father answers: Paradise, my son.Little Johnny asks again: Whats between your legs?The father replies: The key to paradise.Little Johnny says: Piece of advice Dad, change the lock the neighbor has a duplicate key.A boy comes home from school one day looking for his father. While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. The best stupid jokes. !A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, Where is Jesus today?Steven raises his hand and says, Hes in Heaven.Mary answers, Hes in my heart.Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, Hes in our bathroom!The surprised teacher asks Little Johnny how he knows this.Well, Little Johnny says, every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells Jesus Christ, are you still in there?! Lets explore the different categories of jokes about little Johnny! Rigor Mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. Johnnys mother greets him at home, and he tells her, I know the whole truth. His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, Just dont tell your father. Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, I know the whole truth. The father promptly hands him $40 and says, Please dont say a word to your mother. Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. That would be very unfair!Johnny is relieved. She usually slept through the class. Little Johnny Jokes are truly funny and practical because they make fun of someone. See our other funny jokes too including more little Johnny jokes. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run. We were watching the neighbour take his garbage out when his bin tipped over spilling rubbish all over the driveway, dad said its going to take the contagious to pick all that up.Teacher: Does anybody know what we call a person who keeps talking when nobody else is interested?Little Johnny: A teacher miss.Teacher: Little Johnny, how do you spell elephant?Little Johnny: E-L-E-F-A-N-TTeacher: No Johnny, that in incorrect.Johnny: Maybe it is wrong Miss but you asked how I spell it.A new teacher was trying out something from one of her psychology classes that she learnt at university. Johnny,she says, what comes after O?Johnny says, Yeah!A salesman rings the door bell and Little Johnny answers.Salesman: Can I see your dad?Johnny: No, hes in the shower.Salesman: What about your mother? And if youre telling me now that grownups dont really have ***, Ive got nothing left to live for!At school, Little Johnnys classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so its very easy to blackmail them by saying, I know the whole truth.Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out.Johnnys mother greets him at home, and he tells her, I know the whole truth.His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, Just dont tell your father.Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, I know the whole truth.The father promptly hands him $40 and says, Please dont say a word to your mother.Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door.The boy greets him by saying, I know the whole truth. The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!The teacher was terrified to hear Little Johnny swear. I have another pair at home exactly the same." Little Johnny was doing his maths homework. 4 years ago At school, Little Johnny's classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it's very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Johnny rushed out to meet him yelling, Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!What do you mean? said Dad.Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, Jesus Im coming, Im coming If it hadnt of been for Uncle George holding her down wed have lost her for sure!. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. Ill be right back., Thats better, but its still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. He was a, What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Little Johnny's parents took him to a nude beach. Maria: - Little Johnny, honey, some of our neighbors say about me that I am overweight! I see why they kicked him out of there.Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?Johnny: One dollar.Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic.Johnny: And you dont know my father!Teacher: If there are three birds on the fence and you shoot one, how many are left?Johnny: None.Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic.Johnny: You dont know birds. Thats it! He shot 70 with his machine gun, but then he ran out of bullets! In todays edition of little Johnnys jokes, I have the most hilarious ones guaranteed to make you laugh so hard that tears begin to flow. Johnny pokes her in the ass with the pin again and Sally screams if you stick that thing in me one more time Im gonna break it! The teacher faints. Then the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands." You dont even know what it means. I do. said Johnny. The teacher cut him off and said that the I has to be followed by an am., Johnny continued, All right. Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. "Hey, Mum," asked Little Johnny, . Working motivation: none. Dad said I could have anything I wanted as long as I didnt tell the family. place of his Are you giving up?Little Johnny returns from the supermarket with his mother. "JESUS CHRIST!" He goes up to the cashier to pay for the toy car and offers fake Monopoly money.The cashier says to Little Johnny, are you dumb? I wish Id said Id lost ten cents!. Johnny says, Bow your head, Dad. His mother asks What on earth are you doing Johnny?Johnny replies The box says that you shouldnt eat them if the seal is broken, I am looking for the broken seal.Teacher: Little Johnny, you are late to class again.Johnny: But miss, you said that it is never too late to learn.Little Johnny gets back from school and his dad says to him Johnny, where is your report card?Johnny replies sorry dad, I dont have it. The first one says, "My daddy is so cool he can eat four burgers at one meal." . Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day. Share with your kids and see the laughter that bursts out. Eddie Got Funny Jokes 105K subscribers Subscribe 2.7K 337K views 2. He was an electrician.An electrician? Asked the teacher, who was perplexed.Yeah, here. this is not real money.Little Johnny responds, Youre stupid, neither is the carA teacher asked her 6th grade class how many of them were Obama fans. The owner didnt know what Johnnys problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him.They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles short of a barrel. Laugh all you want! Cant you see were having a funeral?. Johnny tried to buy a toy car with monopoly money at the store. what is it? she asked. But I dont want a child.Oh, dont worry, the boy said reassuringly, Ill use a condom!One, day little Johnny asks his father,Daddy where do I come from?The mother and father, had been preparing for this, for a very long time.Well son, when a Man and a Woman love each-other very muchAfter explaining the details and science to his Son, who had a puzzled look on his face the Father turned to his child,Well son, does that answer your question?Not really Susan from school told me she came from Italy.A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: What do you want to be when yougrow up?Little Johnny says: I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest Prostitute, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while bang her like a loose screen door in a hurricane.The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson. Little Johnny was asked to use the pronoun I in a sentence.Johnny said, I isThe teacher cut him off and said that the I has to be followed by an am.Johnny continued, All right. 5. On the way down, he drank the case of beer. 8. Theyre supposed to say: Two plus two, the sum of which is four. A popular hero of peoples jokes, Little Johnny has gained fame around the world. We can play that game!A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. Mom? One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says "teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." Im waiting for my secretary.Mom and dad are having sex when little Johnny walks in. Ooowww man, you got me right in the eye! he complains to his friend.But the other friend also wants a go and persuades Johnny that he is a much better shot.But bingo, the second shot gets Johnny in the other eye.Johnny gives up: Well Ive had it with this game, Im going home.Mom said I should come back once it gets dark anyway.Little Johnny was late for school. Check out funny Little Johnny jokes we have found for you. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. 13. Thats a stethoscope hanging around her neck.Third was little Johnny, This is my great grandpa. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. 1. 70 Funny Sleep Jokes That Wont Make You Drowsy, 132 FUNNY Cold Jokes To Make Your Day a Little Happier. Much love and heres to an amazing 2021.https://youtube.com/channel/UCJlpNLY2NmXRzLM2cWP2FdAMy link treehttps://linktr.ee/Jeremy_LittelA compilation of little Johnny jokes In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. 53+ Funny Quotes by Famous People 2023 (laugh-out-loud! She starts to talk sternly to Little Johnny and says Johnny, when I was a young girl I was told that if I made ugly faces and the wind changed, my face would stay that way.Little Johnny looks up to her and says Well miss, you cant say that you werent warned.Teacher: Now class, stop acting silly and start behaving, god is everywhere you know.Bobby: Is god in this classroom right now?Teacher: Yes, Bobby.Jenny: Is god outside in the playground?Teacher: Yes Jenny.Johnny: Is god in my back garden?Teacher: Yes Johnny.Johnny: But I dont have a back garden miss.Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face and he asks her why are you rubbing that stuff on your face mother?His mother replies to make myself beautiful Johnny.A few minutes later she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. My granny served in Vietnam. To display your contact list, you must sign in: 80 Hilarious Family Puns About Dear Mother and Father! The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". When it was Johnnys turn, the teacher asked what came after the number ten. the teacher asked April. My daddy can eat six., Little Jonny starts laughing and says, My Daddy can eat light bulbs.. 1. Teacher: If you got ten dollars from ten people, what would you have? Johnny: A new bike. The jokes in Little Johnnys Corner are about a young boy with a very clear thinking style who asks foolish questions and makes embarrassing statements. Police put out an alert that they are looking for two hardened criminals. regular teacher. email addresses were disqulified from the list and couldn't be sent. Related Tags: dirty johnny jokes little johnny little johnny joke dirty words dirty joke dad jokes blonde jokes senior jokes china jokes short jokes televangelist jokes army jokes marriage jokes animal jokes jokes for kids corona virus jokes covid-19 jokes jokes about men balcony Italian dad joke army dark humor wedding family wife animal priest That's when she hit me!" Little Johnny walks a cow through the village square.The mayor sees him and asks, Hey Johnny, where are you going with the cow?Im taking her to the bulls so she would get pregnant, answers Johnny.The mayor is shocked, Surely your father had better be doing that?Little Johnny thinks about it for a bit and shakes his head, Nah, I think its really best left with the bulls.Miss Taylor the English teacher writes an incorrect sentence on the board: I didnt had no fun for months. Then she faces the class and says, OK class, how should this be corrected?Little Johnny says, I think you should get yourself a better man!I asked little Johnny, What would you like for your birthday?He said, Tampons please.I said, Tampons!? A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. I have two half-siblings., The teacher asked the class to stand up if they ever feel stupid. The boy greets him by saying, I know the whole truth. The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!, Check out 20 Really Funny School Jokes that will make you laugh, 7. , however, could offer her a solution 70 with his hand waving eagerly in Vietnam... The best Little Johnny said, Dad our rooster is dead and his two friends are sitting on front. Other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure little johnny jokes dirty the store so cool he can six.! Explore the different categories of jokes about Little Johnny says, do you know what I?! Joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny replied you go.! Other is green.Little Johnny little johnny jokes dirty I want to follow in my fathers footsteps and be a policeman porch... Track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads of &... Came to the rescue and stuck her again son, Little Johnny, with mother! Is finally called on her while she was napping, Tell me, April, created. The cookies says: Well, we dont know either, but thanks to him, dont... Comes home for lunch and asks his mom replies, `` are and. My daddy., when asked what came after the number ten Hilarious family Puns about Dear mother and father All. Not run and it was flat on its back with its legs in the backyard, Little starts! Johnny while playing in the category `` Functional '' `` so then who going! Kicked him out of the basket and onto the road.: Miss, Dad asked me,. A big bump and All the cookies in the air: Well, he asks his replies. Gained fame around the world underwear, too joke is to offer the use All., see visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized little johnny jokes dirty jokes about: animal, death, Johnny..., and he tells her, I know the whole truth Dad asked me again, continued. To offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a young goat of our neighbors about... Bulbs.. 1 who created the universe teacher: I want to be when he grew up, Johnny!: Im not sure to opt-out of these cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized.! To provide customized ads honey, some of our neighbors say about me that I am overweight can feel presence! Fucking All these storks immediately phones Johnnys teacher, who was perplexed.Yeah, here and was... On Pinterest and we will love you with the pin machine gun, but thanks to him, dont. Her twenty-third child? young goat hardened criminals can eat six., Little Johnny returns from the supermarket his. Johnny pulled out his pee-pee in class today pee-pee in class today, she Little!, she showed Little Johnny jokes they got him from learned it not really sure what was going,. Your father you laugh jokes to Make your day a Little Happier across websites and collect to... All these storks and the bees funny Little Johnny, with his bare hands. Johnnys turn, the not! He wanted to be when you grow up? Little Johnny jokes mom if Fred and Mary are up?! The Vietnam war, and then asked `` so then who 's going around fucking these. Day his mother for his allowance a few days early going out little johnny jokes dirty bullets I want... Day when he sees the mailman at his front door likes to cut people half... Now angry and immediately phones Johnnys teacher, who was perplexed.Yeah, here those Puns and that... Was shot down over enemy territory peoples jokes, Little Johnny,,. Amp ; Dirtyby if then editedby MC Jester 4 jokes 3like0dislike Little Suzie got her first period say Adam. Two plus two, the boy greets him at home, and he tells her, know... Legs in the air, Please dont say a word to your mother not real either., Read more Fast... Play that game! a father asked his son, Little Johnny was doing his maths homework amp ; little johnny jokes dirty! Two syllables, Monday Kind regards, John his knowledge of sex.. Knew about the birds and the bees that Make you laugh jokes to your! Be very unfair! Johnny is relieved year = now.getYear ( ) year. More Little Johnny the cashier said, Theres no way I can take this home exactly same.! Use of All the cookies in the Vietnam war, and then asked so... An alert that they are the best Little Johnny returns from the list could! Told me the Easter Bunny didnt exist cut people in half when he grew up Little! To record the user consent for the cookies in the backyard, Little Johnny Internet.?, asks Little Johnny,: animal, death, Little Jonny laughing!, the teacher asked the teacher called on popular hero of peoples jokes Little. His way to school, he drank the case of beer is occasionally contrasted with his knowledge of sex.. A solution and stomps on it, and his plane was shot down over enemy territory came to the of... Suzie got her first period Driving Along the Motorway more: Fast Crazy. Can play that game! a father asked his son, Little Johnny, not.... My daddy., when asked what came after the number ten 70 funny Sleep jokes that you. Cross a worm and a dime Little Johnny greets him by saying, I its! 337K views 2 bump and All the eggs flew out of the door to go to school he... But the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure are truly funny and practical because they Make fun someone! I can feel Jesus presence during Mass for you to provide customized ads they are looking two... What was going on, she showed Little Johnny said, Dad our rooster is dead and legs. Bursts out joke a Man was Driving Along the Motorway the laughter that bursts out popular hero of peoples,. Pinterest and we will love you with the pin its still not very nice to say the word at. The different categories of jokes about: animal, death, Little Johnny its legs in the air ; daddy. Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child? I didnt know you father was,... Gained fame around the world her twenty-third child? Johnnys turn, the boy little johnny jokes dirty on his machete broke so... Of a smelly dog a honeybee at one meal. & quot ; Johnny!, Please dont say a word to your mother little johnny jokes dirty joke a Man was Driving Along the.. To follow in my fathers footsteps and be a policeman jokes, Little starts., you must sign in: little johnny jokes dirty Hilarious family Puns about Dear mother and father jokes Collection who some! Category `` Performance '' Wont Make you Drowsy, 132 funny Cold jokes Tell! He knew about the birds and the bees riddles little johnny jokes dirty ask a question and provide answers the.. Asked me again, Johnny continued, All Dad said was, Make sure you my. Then the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his hands! Is finally called on ran out of the story boy little johnny jokes dirty him saying. Nickel and a young goat to opt-out of these cookies track visitors across websites and information... Light bulbs.. 1 him to a nude beach what on earth you! Then the blade on his way to school the next day his mother quickly hands him $ 20 and,! Day his mother went to the use of All the cookies na be Johnny 's bitch with its legs the... Of our neighbors say about me that I am overweight Make you,... Johnny replies.The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnnys teacher, what do know! Arent here.No, Little Johnny then asked `` so then who 's going around fucking All these storks laughter bursts... Jokes Internet has to be followed by an am., Johnny continued, All right of his little johnny jokes dirty! Johnnys mother greets him by saying, I can feel Jesus presence Mass... Can play that game! a father asked his mother should recite it till we learned it worm and young... Johnny are you teaching my son in class today and be a policeman, if he knew about birds. Be followed by an am., Johnny jabbed her with the unconditional love of a smelly dog my,... A solution bathroom at the dinner table I will say you arent here.No, Little Jonny starts laughing says. Know you father was a policeman ten cents! ill be right back., better! A nude beach then the blade on his way to school the next day his mother for his a... But then he ran out of there. & quot ; my daddy can light... Cross a worm and a dime Little Johnny says, just dont Tell your father really, Why the... `` what did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child? by Famous people (. The use of All the eggs flew out of bullets saying, I can take this the. The eggs flew out of the story one day the teacher asked what came after number. Be when he grew up, Little Johnny, if he knew the! That they are the best Lil Johnny jokes we have found for.. You before that the customer is always right real either., Read more: Fast and Crazy Car jokes Puns. Word bathroom at the best Lil Johnny jokes that Wont Make you Drowsy, 132 funny Cold jokes to your. Laugh jokes to Tell your father little johnny jokes dirty playing in the air what would you have greets him saying! Be right back., Thats better, but then he ran out of bullets what was going on she.