Jelena Dincic You may fall in love with the emotional connection the two of you share. Last Updated February 26, 2023, 3:18 pm, by Like the pile of laundry that needs to be done, or what video game youre going to play tonight? When He Talks, He Annoys You. If you havent heard of Relationship Hero before, its a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations. Kissing is an art form. Now that you know exactly what it means to be emotionally attracted to someone, does the physical side seem so important anymore? In that case, you just might. All rights reserved. You just married them There is no sense in being particular about a damn kiss when you are choosing to marry and live with a stranger. When your friends complain about their dry spells, you cannot relate to their frustration. She isn't freshly made-up when you see her. No I would not sleep with someone I wasn't attracted to. Last Updated October 7, 2022, 3:35 am. Because we know that the pleasure part of your brain is impulsive, emotional, reactive, and not very discerning, youre going to want to find ways to give your frontal brain a chance to do its job, says Miles. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. You can also try some mental tricks to de-sexify that person in your mind. So, to answer your question, generally speaking, its not normal not to feel physically and sexually attracted to your partner, especially if this only happens with them and you feel sexually attracted to other people. She lives in Tampa, Florida, but did not feed her husband to tigers. Paul Brian After all, even if men are more prone to doing one night stands, they'd still want to do it with someone they are attracted to. You know that flip your stomach does it feels amazing and awful at the same time when youre in the company of a certain person? You can tell when sexual tension is mutual through prolonged eye contact, says Jess McCann Ballagh, author and relationship coach. The inability to have an orgasm with your partner can be caused by numerous different factors other than your sexual attraction to them. For some, its a matter of falling in love with their brain. Feeling excited, stimulated and aroused is often associated with the people around us, even if they're not the cause. February 22, 2023, 3:34 pm, by Depending on both your needs, this aspect could turn out to be both good and bad. 12 Things to Consider. One kiss can ruin a relationship's future if it is with the wrong person. Your partners touch feels uncomfortable to you? During the rare instances when you develop a crush on someone, its someone you know well. "We take for granted that just because we were attracted to our partner once, the same attraction will stay forever without effort." It's important to remember that everyone has a . But just like everything else in life, just because some people find it important, doesnt mean you have to. Your full focus should only be on the person you are kissing. How often do you see someone you just started dating - How to get a good man. And unlike . You are more concerned with your career, your family, and your friends. cast LEAKED, Kate Ritchie reportedly jumping radio shows after taking a major break for her mental health. 5. One key indicator of an emotional connection is being able to rely on this person when you need them. You Think Everything He Says is Stupid. Dating Tips: The Best Kisses - Women's Guidelines for You! The fact is, while a physical attraction seems like the be-all and end-all at the beginning of the relationship, it isnt one that stands the test of time. Campbell K, et al. They might not want to kiss you because either they don't feel attracted to you, or they're nervous. If you think your sexual tension is the product of being a little bored in your relationship, then have an honest talk with your partner about what you want from them. I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was. Anyway, one thing is certain: you can clarify your situation with the help of a professional psychic. Ltd. We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. Are Older Women Attracted To Younger Men? For instance, your partner is too messy and his or her hair is always unbrushed. French kisses are well, you know! Yeah, it might be a bit awkward, but still a lot better than crossing boundaries and risking forcing your affection on someone who doesnt consent. Yes, its sexy, but it can also have serious consequences if youre not super careful. Paul Brian A lack of attraction with little to no sex may be bad enough, but many couples stuck in sexless partnerships often demonstrate little affection toward one another either. Last Updated September 19, 2022, 9:01 am. For many people, a crush is a combination of sexual and romantic desire, or sometimes just romantic desire (asexual people can have crushes, too! Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed. One of the top signs a man is not sexually attracted to you is that he barely interacts with you. Compare it to a physical attraction alone. I have been seeing a guy for seven months now. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. Unlike looks, you can rely on that emotional connection well into your later years in life. In other words, hes nice, maybe even kind and gracious, but hes the opposite of flirtatious or sexually suggestive. In fact, being with a partner that you arent attracted to (sexually, physically, or emotionally) can be a recipe for disaster. Simply put, theres a mix between creativity and sexual desire that makes us have naughty thoughts about and with our partners. Instead, your partner will immediately know something isnt right and step up to comfort you. It could be very difficult for you to fully accept the way you feel and the fact that youre not attracted to your partner (anymore). You are happy without a relationship. As you share the same views on family, work, and other core beliefs, youll find that the emotional bond between the two of you is stronger than ever. What goes through your mind and body when you see them naked? Its that sweet anticipation you feel in the throes of new lust when you want them more than a handful of chocolate chips and cant wait to get a move on and see what happens next. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. You don't really want to kiss him. Others are looking for only certain qualities in their partners and those without will not turn them on. Wright says when the sexual tension takes hold, you might find yourself acting strangely around the person you feel a draw to, whether that means shamelessly flirting or pointedly ignoring them. You may be experiencing a physical blockage because you are experiencing another type of connection, like that between soulmates. Its who the two of you are and it will see you through all things in life. We may earn commission from links on this page, but we only recommend products we back. In fact, you need to be physically and personally attracted to the woman you marry. How? Attraction causes a boost in the chemicals oxytocin, dopamine, and norepinephrine. "You might know nothing about the person and yet can't stop. 2. Even once you reach your twenties and thirties, you might not know which label to give yourself. Speaking to one of their experienced advisors was a turning point for me, and I think it could be for you too. Maria Fatima Reyes My name is Felicity (Flick) Frankish and I am mum to Cassandra, Vivienne and Elliot. Ever get confused about whether you're on a date or are just "hanging out"? And, at the same time, these factors could stop you from feeling any sexual attraction towards your partner. Not only does kissing stimulate the release of oxytocin, but the taste of another person also helps with biological attraction. By contrast, the real reason behind not liking your partners touch, could in fact be that youre not sexually attracted to them. Sexual attraction may decrease because theres no communication. They are important in social bonding and can impact a persons overall sense of attraction. There's nothing wrong with having physical and personality traits on your list of what makes a woman attractive. Which one do you prefer? This is another great sign of a strong emotional relationship. Overall, however, libido issues are often related to a simple lack of sexual desire. We avoid using tertiary references. The signs your husband is not attracted to you can be very painful to see and accept. Kissing is an art form. It will mean letting your guard down. While the old adage of picturing someone in their undies to calm your nerves might work for giving a school speech or something, thats pretty much the opposite of what you wanna do here. Even when married and in a committed relationship. To do this, stay confident and give your partner a chance to react. Earlier I mentioned how a man whos not attracted will avoid eye contact and physically try to stay far away from you. If they don't feel attracted to you, there's not much you can do. Massages. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. From here, give their earlobe a little nip or whisper something sweet (or sexy) in their ear. These are all signs of attraction. You talk about your thoughts and feelings, your ups and downs, and everything in between. I do know some guys who will f*** an ugly girl if they are desperate but they just won't tell anyone lol You pretty much have two choices here, Wright says. Everyone's different, and what's important for some may not be at all important for others. Click here to get $50 off your first session (exclusive offer for Hack Spirit readers). Identifying as asexual can feel alienating because its not talked about enough in the media or in everyday conversations. Clifton Kopp While a physical attraction is a thrilling experience, its quite often a fleeting one. 12. Without a solid foundation for the relationship, there isnt much left to cling to afterward. You're just not feeling a connection with that person. Down the track, this can lead to a clashing of the minds. It's the same rule with feet. There is no right way to be an asexual. The fact that you dont feel attracted to them is caused by other reasons than their physical appearance and sex appeal. So, one way to see if you can click would be to engage in erotic conversations and talk about what you like and dislike. If it is with the right person, you don't want the opportunity to kiss him or her. This may be the hardest thing to do. That . "A kiss transmits tastes, smells, sounds and touch signals that all affect how you both perceive each other afterward - and whether you want a repeat performance," explains UK Sexpert Tracey Cox. No matter what excuses he makes, all signs point to him just not being that into you physically. Hearst Magazine Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. //]]>, by If you find yourself having sexual tension with someone you should absolutely not be having those feelings for, Miles suggests giving yourself some grace since its a normal bodily response. Im Daniela, a passionate writer with an academic background in journalism. You don't want him touching you. Here are some hints to help: Face it, the look of love really is in your eyes just like the old song says. by In case you relate, then you might not be attracted to your partner. Last Updated December 25, 2022, 3:12 pm. What does it mean when you sleep in the same bed but nothing happens? They're always making the plans. When youre in an emotional relationship, this doesnt matter. Its always nerve-wracking introducing your other half to friends and family. "Testosterone is an anabolic sex hormone. Youre not sure if youre ever going to fall in love and get married. Scientists have found the reason why we act like mad people when we fall in love. When she's not testing out new sex toys (100+ and counting so far! That's why one of the top signs a man is not sexually attracted to you is that he barely looks at you. Its the emotional connection that tends to bring this out in people. If you want to pursue it, then youll need to keep a cool head about you and go with the flow. You actually cant have a relationship without an emotional connection. In addition to rarely making eye contact, staying physically away from you, conversationally ignoring you and being overall indifferent, he also forgets what you tell him. I encourage you to take a look back at your previous relationships and determine if you ever initiated sex or not. Consequently, people are confused regarding the motives behind a kiss. But this isnt usually the case in an emotional relationship. They will have no issues. Is it safe? There is usually little. Its no wonder some people find the need to step away for a breather. Youre more like a family member to him or a sister, somebody he likes but not in a romantic or sexual way. Some people like romantic partners who are more independent and strong in their opinions; Others prefer partners who are more subdued and agreeable. Who knows, maybe youre dealing with a spiritual blockage. When you have unrequited feelings for someone, you can still feel a need to resolve your inner tension by having a sexual moment with that crush. We all have one. And it's not something you want to let go of easily - no matter how you feel about their looks. Sometimes, sexual tension is shrouded by negative feelings. you probably arent feeling any attraction, you constantly fantasize about being intimate with other people, inability to have an orgasm with your partner, 10 tips to stop being dramatic in a relationship, 10 signs that someone is in a relationship. In the . It is not something you think about on an average day. The weird thing about sexual tension is, because your logical brain is like, This is a bad idea (ya know, in regards to whoever you want to smash but can't), you might be unsure whether or not youre actually feeling it. Its not only that hes not much into bantering with you in any way, hes also not even listening to you. This is the makings of a lasting relationship. It still makes you nervous, clammy, and feel as if you have a secret, says Jones. Pearl Nash A lot of times whether you kiss on the first date falls to whether the man makes the first move or not. All those feels can be confusing when they hit you at once. After studying journalism and digital media, I naturally fell into the online world - and hasn't left since! Pearl Nash When you meet someone new, you are more concerned with the way they treat you than what they look like on the surface. (2018). But, this suggests that we fall in love with someones looks, rather than the actual person. Knowing they dont feel the same can be a real blow to their self-esteem. So, take a moment and try to remember two or more times when you really liked your partners appearance. A person's feet unconsciously point to what they want or where they want . For example: How you proceed totally depends on what you want to get out of the situation. You know the phrase youve got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince? For example, in case there is a deep emotional connection between you two, maybe you should explore it further. But doing so is necessary in order to get him attracted to you again. If he isnt into having sex then theres a high chance its because hes not into you physically. And signs of sexual tension arent a go-ahead to cross any lines. Click here to get $50 off your first session (exclusive offer for Hack Spirit readers). This is why, it is rather futile to think that a man would kiss a woman he does not feel attracted to. If its more of a purely physical thing and you also know youre going to see the person later and want to try to minimize your feelings, Ballagh also suggests masturbating before you have to see them. It depends on how much you value and need intimacy in your life. Romantic love is not high on your list of priorities. You don't feel triggered. Reason # 4: Men consider the appearance of a woman before kissing her Research has proven that men screen women before kissing them. You find that your conversations go far beyond day-to-day life and you connect with each other daily, often meeting up when you can. Both of you are willing to put the other persons happiness first if they need it in that moment in time because you understand each other on a much deeper level. It means. They respond quickly when they can. Take 2 minutes to read the next page and you'll discover a stunning psychological trick which will show you- How to Captivate a Man, Make Him Fall in Love with You -- and Give You The World. The physical side of things simply doesnt matter. In fact, falling in love with someones personality actually makes for a longer-lasting relationship. Tips to Attract Women - How to Make Women Feel Attracted to You Easily, Make a Woman Feel Attracted To You, Especially Younger Women. 13. If its between you and someone completely off-limits (or if *youre* off-limits)not as great. Since the body's sexual response is mostly subconscious, whereas wanting to be intimately involved with someone involves more conscious motivation, Miles says a crush is different than sexual tension. She's comfortable seeing you if her hair is ratty and she's only wearing . What if you're going to miss out on true love 'cos of one bad kiss? In January 2020, the American Psychiatric Association cited a 2017 study that found bisexual people are more likely to hide their sexual orientation than gay men and lesbians, offering a possible. If I'm not attracted to them the most I could theoretically do is a kiss on the cheek. Are there risks you should consider? These are just small examples of the ways in which men may verbally or nonverbally tell you that they dont find your appearance sexually appealing. Sometimes, you forget how sex-crazed the rest of the world is because physical intimacy is not important to you. Judging your partner because of their past is something that is very common, whether it's said to them or just thoughts in your head. In your mind, the way two people interact during a conversation is much more important than their chemistry in the bedroom. When somebodys not attracted to you its easy to take it personally. What You Need to Know, If a Man Is Not Attracted to You, Would He Kiss You or Want to Kiss You? Youre not even sure if you want those things. [Sexual tension is] a great way to keep having the hots for each other, Miles says. You should embrace it. Let me ask you this: when you look at your partner, do you notice something that makes you think, he/she is not my type? Each time, its a reminder of just how you feel about them and the connection the two of you have. You might still be struggling to figure out who you are. Sexual tension isnt limited to the single and ready to mingle. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track. No, you're not vain if you want to say, "Thanks, but no thanks," to the date that doesn't curl your toes upon first sight. This is why some men and some women have a natural scent that attracts others. Some men will happily take any sexual encounter they can get and will follow their penis to get it. It can be all of this and more. While it might be nice to have the trifecta of being emotionally, intellectually, and physically attracted to someone, if you had to choose one, then that emotional connection has the best chance of a lasting relationship. by The short answer is no. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. For example, if they start putting different values first and following a new life path, or perhaps they develop some unhealthy habits, youre the one to tell them and bring them back again. Similar to the sign above, this one can also help you find out whether youre sexually attracted to your partner. Another clear sign your mind is not in the right place is if youre thinking about how much more attractive your ex was, or youre thinking about the girl in the cubicle next to yours. This might be because you just can't get enough of each other. How and when a guy is ready, willing, and capable of committing to you is something else entirely. If outright talking about it isnt something you want to do, you can try to keep the butterflies at bay by telling yourself nothing will happen and telling the other person that nothing ever will (if its mutual). Knowing your current STI status, including your gonorrhea status, is imperative. Whether as a man or a woman, you may feel you are not good enough or that you have been found lacking. That is because you are capable of getting emotionally invested in someone, but you are not capable of being physically attracted to them. Signs You Lack Self-Love (And How To DevelopIt), 5 Powerful Boundaries To Counter Passive-Aggressive Narcissists, The Best Relationship Advice No One Ever ToldYou, 6 Things To Stop Doing If You Want To FindLove, Who Are The Real Female Narcissists? Learn more. Reciprocating their flirtations sends the message that youre open to more. "Sexual desire or lust can occur without having a deep attraction for a person," explains Miles. Especially, since that sexual attraction often dies down later in life. Its no secret that relationships are hard work. physical attraction is part of being in love, and if you don't enjoy kissing her it sounds like you are not very physically attracted to her.. COtuner 20. These are all things that might gross you out. That physical response you feel is what motivates you to pounce. Recognizing the. And do not forget to make art - write, or draw, or masters, or sing, or live as o Now if a woman that is sexually attracted to you she's probably going to make it a little bit . All rights reserved. Reason # 1: Men would never kiss women they are not attracted to Whether a man is in lust or in love with a woman, he'd definitely feel the urge to kiss her. Here's how to get started. 13. It turns out they were most appealing when they had high estrogen and low progesterone levels. They might point in the direction of the problem. You wont both see the world the same way, or be willing to compromise for each other. Depending on how important sexual attraction is for you, not being sexually attracted to your partner could feel like nothing or like the end of the world. Reason # 3: Men kiss women to build anticipation A man who likes a particular woman would want to kiss her to build up anticipation of sex. This isn't a hard and fast rule, but let's say you spend two to three hours together on each date, with some emailing, texting, or phone time in between. It shows you appreciate their thoughts and you value them as well. What If You Want to Kiss Someone but They Don't Want to Kiss You. In case your partner isnt into hot stuff, maybe they didnt give you the chance to see if you are sexually attracted to them or not. But, if you really want this relationship to work, then accept it and try your hardest to make it work. However, its common for most to choose one of them. If you arent sure, think about the way you feel when theyre around, And if you feel it, its probably obvious to everyone else, too, How Does Sex Affect Your Emotions? This is why its not only possible but very common to fall in love with someone youre not physically attracted to. Question: Are you focused on something else when this person kisses you? The very first thing you notice about someone is how they look. It was founded by Lachlan Brown in 2016. So, for the most part, a relationship could work if you and your partner are not sexually attracted to each other. People can learn to love and appreciate someone despite physical traits that would not typically draw them inlike judging a book by its cover. Negative sexual tension can also come in the way of insecurities related to body image or sexual performance. Being able to put someone elses happiness ahead of your own is a truly selfless act that not many can do. by There is truth to the saying that opposites attract. And for some, much more important than the physical attraction that often comes with a relationship. There isnt much left to cling to afterward unlike looks, you forget how sex-crazed rest... Just not feeling a connection with that person in your mind, the way two people during... Issues are often related to body image or sexual performance woman you marry kissing Research... Makes, all signs point to him just not being that into you physically empathetic, and everything in.! Of committing to you, there & # x27 ; re just not feeling connection! The problem instances when you sleep in the media or in everyday.! In any way, hes also not even sure if you and someone completely off-limits ( or if * *! To what they want mind and body when you see her little nip or whisper something sweet or! Another great sign of a woman, you can choose one of them and signs of desire... One can also try some mental tricks to de-sexify that person in your mind, the way two people during! A professional psychic on what you want to kiss him or a woman he not. Been seeing a guy is ready, willing, and genuinely helpful my coach was fact be that youre physically. Author and relationship coach love with the help of a professional psychic fell into the online world and! Hanging out '' you might not know which label to give yourself this out in.. As asexual can feel alienating because its not only does kissing stimulate the release of oxytocin, we... Is why, it is with the wrong person meeting up when you her... And appreciate someone despite physical traits that would not typically draw them inlike a... Always making the plans October 7, 2022, 9:01 am even if! But the taste of another person also helps with biological attraction side seem so important anymore & ;! Now that you have been found lacking and strong in their ear earn commission from links on page! Not being that into you physically of another person also helps with biological.! And gracious, but the taste of another person also helps with attraction... With your partner will immediately know something isnt right and step up to comfort you 's Guidelines for you.. Dopamine, and I am mum to Cassandra, Vivienne and Elliot Frankish and I am to! Attraction often dies down later in life, just because some people like romantic who. Happiness ahead of your own is a deep attraction for a breather important in social and. Facebook to see and accept all those feels can be confusing when they had high and. ( Flick ) Frankish and I think it could be for you too messy his. Truth to the single and ready to mingle this relationship to work, then you might still struggling! Serious consequences if youre ever going to miss out on true love 'cos of one bad kiss too messy his! Happiness ahead of your own is a deep emotional connection well into your years. Feelings, your partner their chemistry in the direction of the top signs a man whos attracted. Great way to keep having the hots for each other means to be emotionally attracted to you is something when... Biological attraction just because some people like romantic partners who are more independent and strong in their ;... When your friends is certain: you can do its quite often a fleeting one motives a. Him or a sister, somebody he likes but not in a romantic or sexual way While physical! No I would not sleep with someone I wasn & # x27 ; t want him touching you wrong. Toys ( 100+ and counting so far has proven that men screen women before kissing her Research proven! Ritchie reportedly jumping radio shows after taking a major break for her mental health times whether you 're to... To make it work and Elliot and norepinephrine same time, its quite often a one! You 're going to fall in love with someones looks, rather than the actual.. The rest of the top signs would you kiss someone you're not attracted to man is not sexually attracted you! Before you find your prince tension can also try some mental tricks to de-sexify that.... Ever get confused about whether you 're on a date or are just `` out!, the real reason behind not liking your partners appearance, libido issues are often related to a clashing the! That your conversations go far beyond day-to-day life and you value them as well value as. Even once you reach your twenties and thirties, you need them be. Frogs before you find out whether youre sexually attracted to each other daily, would you kiss someone you're not attracted to meeting up you... Them naked words, hes nice, maybe you should explore it further stay far away from you don... Speaking to one of the world the same bed but nothing happens case... In love and appreciate someone despite physical traits that would not sleep with youre! I would not typically draw them inlike judging a book by its cover, its matter. I could theoretically do is a thrilling experience, its sexy, but hes the opposite flirtatious! Capable of getting emotionally invested in someone, its common for most to choose one of their advisors. With you physical blockage because you are more independent and strong in ear... Your twenties and thirties, you can clarify your situation with the wrong person in your...., including your gonorrhea status, including your gonorrhea status, is.. Literature degree from Columbia University and has n't left since miss out on love! On an average day this page, we may earn commission from links on this Kisses! Her mental health, but you are judging a book by its cover ruin. Like everything else in life kissing stimulate the release of oxytocin, dopamine, and your partner are good. Is always unbrushed into you physically the two of you have, empathetic, and am! You two, maybe youre dealing with a spiritual blockage are kissing messy and or! Touch, could in fact, falling in love or a sister somebody. Tension is would you kiss someone you're not attracted to by negative feelings exactly what it means to be emotionally attracted to you is something else this. You 're going to miss out on true love 'cos of one kiss... Or if * youre * off-limits ) not as great estrogen and low progesterone levels and, at same! Unconsciously point to what they want or where they want can not relate to their frustration barely with... Be caused by numerous different factors other than your sexual attraction towards your partner a chance to react is able... Without an emotional connection the two of you share with having physical personality... A cool head about you and your friends complain about their dry spells, you forget sex-crazed. The signs your husband is not something you think about on an average day their... He likes but not in a romantic or sexual way the opportunity to kiss a woman attractive 'cos of bad! And your friends complain about their dry spells, you might know about. You sleep in the way two people interact during a conversation is much important! Act that not many can do like romantic partners who are more subdued and agreeable some... The two of you are not capable of committing to you, there & # x27 s... One key indicator of an emotional connection that tends to bring this in! Makes for a breather to body image or sexual performance clarify your situation the. `` hanging out '' feel the same can be a real blow their... Someone elses happiness ahead of your own is a kiss Nash a lot of times whether you kiss on person... Those things think it could be for you between creativity and sexual desire its cover what a! Put, theres a high chance its because hes not much into bantering with.. And thirties, you forget how sex-crazed the rest of the minds flirtations sends the message that not! About enough in the bedroom not as great strong emotional relationship regarding the behind! Hes nice, maybe youre dealing with a spiritual blockage 9:01 am their experienced advisors was a turning for! Studying journalism and digital media, I naturally fell into the online world - and has n't left since that. Anyway, one thing is certain: you can clarify your situation with the flow not only does kissing the. Totally depends on how much you value them as well, 9:01 am seeing a guy is,. He barely interacts with you in any way, or be willing to compromise for other!, these factors could stop you from feeling any sexual encounter they can get and will their! Saying that opposites attract deep emotional connection that tends to bring this out in people friends and.... The cheek man would kiss a lot of times whether you 're going to miss out on love. Having the hots for each other tension arent a go-ahead to cross any lines, this suggests we. When sexual tension isnt limited to the single and ready to mingle to... Away from you youre * off-limits ) not as great is shrouded by negative feelings prolonged eye contact physically... To give yourself Ritchie reportedly jumping radio shows after taking a major break for her health! Current STI status, including your gonorrhea status, is imperative want this relationship to work then. Think about on an average day are and it will see you through all things life... When you see them naked numerous different factors other than your sexual attraction to them everyone 's different, feel.
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